


The Consequence of Happiness (Despair)

by sandean_cas



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Castiel Confesses Feelings for Dean Winchester, Castiel and Dean Winchester Need to Use Their Words, Castiel is Loved (Supernatural), Dean Winchester Has a Crush on Castiel, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, Dean Winchester is Bad at Feelings, Destiel Week (Supernatural), Episode: s15e18 Despair, Hopeful Ending, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Quote: We are. (Supernatural: Raising Hell), Season/Series 15 Spoilers, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-07
Updated: 2020-11-07
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:00:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27427570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sandean_cas/pseuds/sandean_cas
Summary: Sam and Jack head back to the bunker and find Dean still on the floor. Feels ensue.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 5
Kudos: 164





	The Consequence of Happiness (Despair)

**Author's Note:**

> AHOY! SPOILERS FOR 15X18 DEAD AHEAD

The bunker is eerily silent when they enter. Jack at his side is the only thing that stops him from panicking.

“Dean?” He calls into the deafening silence. His steps are slow and dragging, because as much as he wants to find Dean, he also  _ can’t _ handle finding Dean injured or worse after all the loses from today.

They lost  _ the world _ . Everyone. Every person they saved and the ones they didn’t. Sam can’t cope, between that and Eileen, he just needs his brother. The one constant in his whole life. And he can’t find him.

“Cass?” He tries, hating how strangled he sounds.

Once more he dials Dean’s phone sighing once more as it just rings and rings.

“Wait.” Jack says, before he hangs up in frustration. “Listen.”

Sam listens. It takes him a moment to focus enough to hear it… the faint buzzing sound coming from the dungeon. Withdrawing his weapon, he gestures to Jack to get behind him. Stealthily, they both make their way to the dungeon.

The door is sprawling open and inside is Dean. His phone vibrates harshly against the concrete floors but he makes no attempt to move.

Despair mars Dean’s self. Sam can’t see his face but he can sense it from all the way over here. It’s heavy and sticky, clinging to the walls of the room like mold. In all his life, Sam has never seen Dean look so small. His legs are drawn up, his hands folded over his knees with his face buried somewhere between it all.

Cass is distinctly absent. And from the way Dean’s shoulders heave and he doesn’t even seem to notice when they enter the room, it speaks volumes.

“Dean?” It’s Jack. His eyes dart everywhere, searching for Cass.

At the sound of his voice Dean’s head tilts up slowly, enough to show his still watery, red rimmed eyes.

Cass is dead. Sam knows it in that moment. He doesn’t need Dean to tell him, now when despair is written all over his face.

“How?”

And that seems to break him, because his head bows again and he sobs loudly.

“It’s all m’ fault. I pissed her off and Cass… he saved me. He told me that - that- I didn't get to tell him - the Empty it...”

“What?” Sam blurts, unable to stop himself.

“The deal.” Jack’s voice is hollow. “Oh, Dean I’m so sorry.”

“I-I got him killed.”

“No you didn’t.” Jack’s voice is firm. “You really didn’t know he- how he felt?”

Dean looks back down into his lap.

“He loved you. Saving you and finally letting himself be happy.... That isn’t a bad end Dean. And who says it  _ is _ the end?”

“Yeah.” Sam agrees, voice still rough. Because despite all their talk, Cass is still  _ dead. _ They can try their damndest to save him, but who knows if it’ll be enough.

But hearing that would break Dean, so instead, Sam says, “We’re going to save Eileen, and Cass and Donna. We’re going to save them all. Because that’s what we do.”


End file.
